Washington Capitals (NHL) – “Wait wait! We have the Capitals” some of you might argue. “They’re good; they’re like first place in the league.” True, but we live in D.C. in a “what have you done for me lately” society, and frankly what have the Caps done for me?    I’ll be honest and say I like the Caps, and I’ve begun to enjoy watching hockey more (and it’s probably the best sport to watch live at a game.)  But I want championships, and the last playoff memory I have of the Caps is losing AT HOME to our bitter rivals in a GAME 7 (6-2!) – That, my friends, is what you call un-clutch.  It’s like being in a solid relationship and doing everything right for 364 days until you forget your anniversary – there’s no way you can redeem yourself until next year’s anniversary and for that entire year your significant other can’t really believe what you did to her last year.  It doesn’t even really matter what you’ll do this year until your next anniversary (if there is one) and it better be the best anniversary idea ever.  That’s what the Caps did to me last year.  They scored a lot of goals, won a lot of games, played well as a team, but come around the time it really mattered, they epically failed.  It doesn’t even matter that this year they’re scoring the most goals had a 14 game winning streak – none of that matters until they deliver the Stanley Cup.

The Caps have only been to the Stanley Cup once, losing in four straight games to the Red Wings in 1998.  Otherwise, nada, zilch, cero, as in no Stanley Cups at the Cap’s locker room at the Verizon Center since the Cap’s existence began in 1974.  Of all the Washington area teams; however, the Capitals are the closest to winning it all and have the most potential – they have Ovechkin signed to a long-term deal, Green and Semin locked through the 2012 and 2011 respectively, and are looking to ink Backstrom to a deal as well.  That’s a core I can believe in.  Who would have thought the hope of D.C. area sports is in the hands of two Russians, a Canadian and a Swede?    Until they win the cup, though, they are still underachieving and a sports team that has yet to deliver in my life-time for this region.

Verdict:  They have the potential, but they better deliver.  They have a crazy Russian winger to pull it off too.

Talking points: Ovechkin – can he deliver the Stanley Cup, the rivalry between the Capitals and the Penguins.

Washington Redskins (NFL) – Ah, here we are at the Redskins.  I’m pretty sure over 90% of the people in this region don’t know how the name came about so I did a little research:  Redskins were originally called the Boston Braves.  The owner of the Braves in honor of the head coach, William Henry Dietz, renamed the team to the Redskins as the coach claimed to be part Sioux.  The Sioux are an American Indian tribe that was traditionally located in the Midwest.  Soon thereafter, the team relocated to Washington where it has kept that name ever since.

I can’t recollect those glory days in the 80’s and early 90’s well probably because I was more fascinated about Mario, toy cars, and my Lego set.  Granted, I do remember recording the Super Bowl on our VHS system and watching bits and pieces of the game itself.  But during my adolescence, college, and post-college years not a single good memory of the Redskins exists.  I only remember Sean Taylor getting shot in Miami, Shaun Suisham missing a FG against the Seahawks in the playoffs that would have given us a 17-13 lead (we lost 35-14), the Zorn/Snyder era, and the return of Gibbs (mixed results but hey, he got us to the playoffs and even won a game).

Do the Redskins have potential? I don’t think so.  Mike Shanahan is going to have one hard time coaching this team – we have players that think they’re better than coaches (I’m talking to you, Portis), players that aren’t in condition to play (fat Albert anyone? How many times did we waste a freaking time out so you can get your behind back to the sidelines?), players that are too old (umm, our entire offensive line), players that think they’re about 1000% better than they really are (DeAngelo Hall, you were okay at Tech, you suck now), players who need to demonstrate leadership (Campbell, you got the physical gifts, but the greatest leaders throughout history were the ones that demonstrated the most heart), players that go for the big hit every time (LaRon Landry, I watched Brandon Marshal blow by you twice for huge TD’s cause you freaking gambled on the play thinking it was going to the TE… LIVE in section 110 seat 8!), players who pout w/o the ball (presenting, Santana Moss!  If the ball isn’t thrown his way within 3 seconds, he stops the route and jogs it out) and players who aren’t living up to expectations (the entire second round draft of 2008).  To add insult to injury, we drafted Devin Thomas and Fred Davis before DeSean Jackson in that draft.

Honestly, I don’t blame Zorn.  He interviewed for the O-coordinator job and got it.  When Snyder and Cerrato forgot to hire a head coach they just promoted him ‘cause there was no one else left to hire.  If you were Zorn, would you have declined it?  Basically let me put it like this.  If I went to a rental car company and wanted a simple small four-door SUV, which they say they have but they also tell me that they’d upgrade me free to the Corvette would I take it? Hell yeah I’d take it.  That’s what happened to Zorn.  But after I signed the contract it begins to snow and I have to drive down a mountain.  Do I begin to regret my decision? I think so.  That’s what happened to Zorn again.  Look, Zorn sucks as a head coach, but he was never meant to have that job to begin with. He was a good quarterback coach (as the Raven’s just hired him for that position) and maybe had the potential to be a good O-coordinator, but once he got hired as head coach the players knew he didn’t have the experience.  That’s when all hell broke loose and our organization went down the tube.  There are a few glimmers of hope on the team.  Orakpo, Fletcher, Carter and others still played well throughout the year.   But that’s about it.  We had a chance to beat the Saints when they were undefeated, and we seriously choked that game away.  We’ve always had a chance but never capitalized.  Is that bad coaching?  Is that poor team management?  Is that a sign of incompetent ownership? Yes, yes, and yes.  Which is why sadly, I don’t think this team can turn it around until Snyder stays out of the day-to-day operations.  I like the fact that he’s a die-hard fan, but he doesn’t know anything about evaluating players or building a team together so he’s got to just stay out.

I’ve watched highlights of the old Redskins and they were good.  They are the area’s most decorated team with three Super Bowl victories but it’s been a while.  However, unlike all the other sports, the football season is set up so that as long as you get into the playoffs anything can happen.  (To make this ultra-nerdy, in baseball, hockey and basketball 162, 82, 82 games are played respectively throughout the year.  You can be statistically confident about the good teams being on top of the standings in any given year.  In football, only 16 games are played, you can’t be as confident statistically speaking, about the top teams in any given year.  That’s what makes football so great; anyone can win in any given year.)  So, do the Redskins have potential?  Yes, the players don’t, but the team does.

Verdict:  Snyder may have learned his lesson and if he stays out of Bruce Allen’s and Mike Shanahan’s ways there is hope.  It is sad that hope is all I have.

Talking points:  Mike Shanahan/Bruce Allen hiring, Jason Campbell (will they trade him), Zorn.

Now with this information at hand, anytime you need a filler in an awkward moment, bring up sports.  Sports teams will always bring about passionate responses.  Rarely are people lukewarm about their sports teams: they either follow them passionately or don’t follow sports period.  If that’s the case, check out weather.com and have plan B on hand.

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