Image from colddayforpontooning

You go out on a date with someone and have a nice time. You start to text back and forth all day, make pseudo-plans for the future, things are looking up for you two. But then the communication stops. You don’t know enough about this person, (and you have too much pride), to question them as to what is wrong, so you are left confused. Time goes by, and you realize you will never get your answer. Anger, sadness, and decreased self-esteem inevitably follow.

I think a lot of people have chosen to just ignore someone as a way to get out of an unpleasant dating situation. And while ignoring is effective, it is rude. Are you normally rude to people you do not know very well? I doubt you are.

I have been on both sides of this equation. For the ignoree: it’s just plain hurtful. For the ignorer: you’re always looking out to make sure you don’t run into them. Either side is unpleasant.

Recently I have embraced bowing out gracefully. I have been real with people. Although it may be a little difficult to do, I see that by being kind and honest, I can still get what I want (to stop dating the person) and not have to hurt them along the way, and vice versa. When someone tells me that they don’t think we are right for each other, I admire their maturity and appreciate the guts it took to be honest with me. Sure there’s a sting, but it doesn’t last half as long when I am treated with respect.

It sounds so simple. Quite the revelation I’m having: Be Nice To People, Treat Others As You Would Want To Be Treated. Dating is such a difficult, and at times emotional, playing field, that I often worry only about myself. I don’t want to be hurt by dating, but I don’t want to hurt others either. I also don’t want to be dodging men in the hallway or at a restaurant because I’ve been a bitch to them in the past. Karma.